When I want to buy a coffee and donut the freakin clerk have to crack this goofy ass smile, roll their stupid eyes, or say some stupid joke about cops and donuts? Yes, I know its funny seeing a cop buy a donut. I know I’m keeping the stereotype alive but they are so freakin good! I feel I now have to ask people to buy a donut for me when they walking into the store so I can bypass Mr. Smart-Ass-Clerk-Dude, like the underage kid that asks people to buy cigarettes for them.
Me: Sir Sir! Can you help me out man?
Sir: Yes officer?
Me: Hey can you... *looking around to see if anyone is looking* Can you get me one glazed donut?
Sir: A glazed donut?
Me (looking around nervously): Shhhh!!! Keep it down man! Keep it down! Yes glazed! I need the stuff man! Baaaddd!!
Sir: Ooookkkk...?
Me (kind of whispering): Just... Just don't say it's for me ok man? OH CRAP! The clerk is looking at us... act like you don't know me! Act like you don't know me man!
I don't want to hit rock bottom like that, but Mr. Smart-Ass-Clerk-Dude is not giving me a choice!
I'm reaching out here! Can anyone get me a donut? I'm good for it! Just tell the clerk it’s not for me and pretend you're playing somewhere else.
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